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You and I Together Page 18
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“Bentley.” I reply playfully, pushing the shirt from his shoulders and letting it fall to the floor. I trace my fingers along the curve of his chest and across the ripple of his abs, smiling to myself when he takes a sharp inhale as my hand skirts over his groin.
The moment my hand closes around his hardening erection through his pants, I know I have won. Because no matter how badly I want to see New York, there is one thing I want even more......
****
“Well what do you think? Is New York everything you thought it would be?” Bentley asks, resting his hand lazily on my leg as he weaves in and out of the late evening traffic.
“And more.” I sigh, looking out of the car window at the city passing by. New York is amazing. And while I am so happy to have gotten to experience it this way, with Bentley, I also can't deny the sadness that has slowly been creeping in since the minute we arrived here late this morning.
It's normal I guess. Facing a dream head on and admitting that it will never come true. It is hard letting go and realizing that something you worked most of your life for will never happen. But that isn't all that has been bothering me either.
Since realizing a few hours ago that I am late for my period, my mind has constantly been wandering back to that fact. Every little thing makes me ask the question, what if I really am pregnant? At first, I thought I was just being silly. I mean, I have been on birth control for years and never had an issue. I trust the medication, but I also know that it's always a possibility, especially given that we haven't used a condom beyond our first couple of times together.
So when Bentley stopped by a hot dog stand just outside of Central Park and bought me a coney, I tried to ignore the fact that the smell made my stomach twist. When he insisted that I try dessert from his favorite bakery, I tried to ignore how sick I felt after eating only two bites of the pastry he got for me.
The more time that passes, the more I worry. And while I am one hundred percent aware that this is probably all in my mind, I also know that I will not be able to stop worrying about it until I take a test. I thought about mentioning it to Bentley while we walked hand and hand through the city but I just couldn't find the right time or the right words.
I mean, how do you tell a man you have only known a few short months and been seeing even less than that, that you may or may not be carrying his child? It just doesn't seem real, even when I think about it. It just doesn't seem possible.
“You okay?” Bentley's voice pulls me from my thoughts and I flip my eyes towards him to find him studying me curiously. It takes me a moment to realize that we have stopped and that we are currently sitting behind an old building off of some back alley.
“Sorry.” I smile weakly at him. “I don't think I have completely recovered from last night.” I say, swallowing down my sudden queasiness. All in your head Anna, all in your head; I keep repeating to myself. “Where are we anyways?”
“Sapphire.” He says, smiling widely when I realize that we are right outside of his New York club. As excited as I am to see the place, I have to admit I have an ulterior motive for really wanting to be here.
Pushing the pregnancy issue as far back as I can manage, I take a deep breath and try to prepare myself for what might face me when I walk through those doors. Will Madison be here? Will I be able to find her or get her alone long enough to actually speak to her? Will it turn out Cora meant what she said about warning me or will she turn out to be the shit starter I have always thought her to be?
All the answers wait inside the building to my left. Pushing the car door open, I look up at the large building, noticing immediately that it resembles the location of Allure. The building is older and appears to house a small boutique on the main floor. Like Allure and the club in Seattle, it is tucked away in a manner that conceals the club but at the same time, is still located in the heart of the city.
“Come on.” Bentley nods his head towards a large steel door at the rear of the building. Closing my door, I quickly cross the space to join him, my eyes immediately squinting as he opens the door and leads me into a dim hallway that extends about twenty feet or so before leading to another steel door.
Pushing his way through the second door, I immediately expect to see the lobby of the club but instead, it's another long hallway. This one leads to a stairwell and then another door. It isn't until we push our way through the door at the bottom of the stairs that we finally step inside the main entrance of Sapphire.
“Wow.” The word falls from my lips as Bentley entwines his fingers with mine and pulls me through the lobby.
The club is very similar to Allure only instead of being designed in reds, the color theme is a deep blue. The overhead lights have a blue hue, the long rug leading through the lobby is blue, the accents on the walls are blue. All matched with a black back drop that gives the club a staggering appeal.
Bentley pulls me through the lobby, nodding at the two men working the door without stopping to speak to them. Leading me down a large corridor, I am speechless when the main room of the club comes into view. Other than the color scheme, it is almost dead on Allure. It's very clear to see that while he may change a few things here and there, there is definitely a consistency through out his clubs. I noticed that while in Seattle and now it is blindingly clear here.
“I have to find Jessie. The night manager.” He elaborates when he realizes I have no clue who Jessie is. “You want to come with me?” He speaks directly into my ear over the noise of the music.
“Actually, do you mind if I wait out here?” I ask, playing it off like I just want to get a feel for the place and nothing else.
“Sure. I will be back soon.” He says, kissing the top of my head before gesturing towards the bar. “Henry will take good care of you. Order anything you would like.” He says, throwing me one last look before turning around and walking away.
Making my way to the bar, as much as I want a nice stiff drink, I refrain. Simply ordering a water when Henry, the very good looking bartender, approaches me. He reminds me a lot of Malcolm which in turn, reminds me of Cora and the things she told me last week.
“Henry right?” I ask the man when he re-approaches my spot at the bar, sliding a water with lemon across the counter to me.
“Yes ma’am.” He replies, giving me a brilliant smile.
Playing up the man's flirtatiousness and the fact that he has no idea who I actually am, I lean forward on the bar and hit him with my best smile. “I'm looking for someone. Madison. Is she working tonight?” I ask.
“She's on stage.” He cocks his head towards the middle of the room, drawing my attention to the tall lengthy brunette currently working the stage.
I wave my hand dismissively at him without breaking my eyes away from the beauty on stage, who has currently pulled the attention of every man in the room to her. I watch the way she works the pole, the way she wraps her long legs around the metal and spins, lifting her leg high enough to tease but not so high that she shows too much, one of my own signature moves.
When she walks down the cat walk and pushes her long hair away from her face, I feel like all the wind leaves my body. She's gorgeous. Full lips, bright eyes, the perfect little nose. She whips her long hair around, dropping to her knees at the end of the stage as her routine starts to wind down.
I can't make myself do anything but watch her. Because honestly, other than her obvious beauty, I kind of feel like I am watching myself. The way she moves, the way she commands the stage. She possesses a lot of the same qualities that I do and for whatever reason, that does not sit well with me.
She stands and exits the stage before I even have time to process that she is finished with her dance. Immediately standing, I cross the room and duck through a door along the back wall, assuming it will lead me backstage, which it does.
Unfortunately, like at Allure, there is a bouncer on the other side who immediately stops me when I step through. It isn't until I realize it's Ethan that I breathe out a sig
h of relief.
“Anna?” He questions, cocking his head to the side. “What are you doing here?” He asks, surprising me by saying so many words at one time. I swear, this man never speaks.
“I'm here with Bentley. Just checking the place out. Do you mind?” I ask, gesturing towards the hall.
“Go ahead.” He says, nodding his head in that direction.
“Thanks Ethan. I'll see you later.” I call, taking off down the hallway as quickly as I can without being too obvious.
Like our dressing rooms, each door has the name of the dancer on the outside. Checking each one, I finally come to a stop at one of the last doors on my right. Taking a deep breath, I reach up and knock lightly against the wood, holding my breath as heeled feet click against the floor on the other side of the door.
The minute the door swings open and Madison's eyes meet mine, my stomach twists in the worst sort of way and I am immediately thinking about a way to get out of this situation without being too obvious. I don't know what I was thinking coming here.
“I....I.” I start, but then Madison says something that literally renders me immobile.
“Logan.” She says, pushing the door open wider. “Please, come in.”
Chapter
Twenty-Three
“I'm sorry, but how do you know me?” I ask, stepping inside the dressing room that looks almost identical to my own, closing the door behind me.
“Bentley.” She smiles and crosses the room, taking a seat on the couch along the far wall. “Sit.” She says, patting the spot next to her.
Crossing the space, I take a seat on the opposite end of the couch and turn inward to face her. For whatever reason, I am incredibly nervous and it takes everything I have to keep the shake from my voice when I finally start to speak.
“It's Madison right?” I ask, just wanting to be one hundred percent sure.
“Madeline but yes.” She answers, leaning back onto the couch. “I must say, I am surprised that you are here.”
“I'm sorry but I'm really confused. How is it that you know me?” I ask, still not able to grasp what is going on.
“Because I came to see you dance.” She laughs, crossing her arms in front of herself but otherwise, seeming completely at ease. “A couple of months ago. I have to admit, you're gorgeous on that stage. I can see why he was drawn to you.”
“And you did that why?” I ask, not trying to hide my confusion.
“Because when you find out the man you are in love with is supposedly in love with someone else, curiosity kind of sets in.” She admits, shrugging.
“I'm sorry. I'm not sure why I am even here.” I admit, preparing to stand but then her words halt my movements.
“You're here because you wanted to know if what Cora told you was true.” She says matter of fact. “That woman has never been good at minding her own business. So what exactly is it that you want to know Logan?” She asks, pinning her blue eyes on me.
“I don't really know exactly. I guess I was just curious if you even existed or if you were just some last ditch effort by Cora to drive a wedge between me and Bentley.” I shrug, shifting in my seat.
“I don't know what Cora told you. But if you are here looking for answers as to whether or not Bentley means everything he is telling you, I can assure you, you don't want to hear what I have to say. Don't get me wrong, I made my peace with it and I am trying to move on. But moving on past a man like Bentley is much easier said then done.” She admits, breaking my gaze for a moment.
“I'm sorry.” I say, once again preparing to stand. “I didn't come here to dig up old wounds.” I say, getting the feeling that my arrival has done nothing but rub salt in a still very open sore.
“Please. It's fine.” She says, shrugging it off.
“So you and Bentley....” I start and she immediately chimes in.
“We dated, yes.” She admits. She shifts her body inward so that she is facing me head on before continuing. “I remember the first time I saw him. I had no idea he was the owner. He requested a private dance which I happily gave him. I mean, he was by far the sexiest man I had ever seen. I found out a couple of days later who he was when he came back and asked if he could take me to dinner. Things just kind of escalated from there. He was always very private with me, which I wasn't offended by. I understood that his life required a certain level of privacy. So I never questioned why we couldn't announce to the world that we were together. I just accepted it as part of being the girl by his side. He was busy opening a club in Philly so I didn't get to see him often but when I did, oh my God, that man took my breath away. It wasn't until I found out about the baby that everything kind of fell apart.”
“Baby?” The word falls from my mouth on a gasp and my hand immediately falls to my stomach without me even realizing it.
“I found out I was pregnant after a couple of months of us seeing each other. When I told him, he lost his mind. We always used protection so he adamantly denied it being his. Of course, up to this point, I didn't realize that he was still sleeping with other people so apparently he thought I was also. He stopped coming around. He didn't call or visit. Weeks passed and I heard nothing from him. I thought that he really cared for me, I did. I think at the end of the day, I just felt really stupid for thinking that I was anything to him other than a piece of ass when he came into town.”
“And the baby?” I ask, needing to know more.
“I miscarried, nine weeks in.” She says, letting out a slow exhale.
“I'm so sorry.” I say, wanting to reach out and comfort her but knowing that I shouldn't.
“It's okay. It was a few months ago and things are better now.”
“But why are you still here then? If he treated you that way, why still work for him?” I ask, not sure why this is the one thing that isn't sitting right with me.
“Because I make more money here than I could anywhere else and honestly, it gives me a way to stay connected to him, ya know?” She asks.
For a moment, I let go of the fact that I am looking at a girl that had her heart broken by the very man I am in love with, and I see her for the girl that she is. In some weird way, I get where she's coming from. If I lost Bentley, I don't know how I could let him go completely.
“And what is your relationship like now?” I ask.
“If he comes here he will say hello but to an outsider looking in, you would never know that anything had ever happened between us. Must be nice.” She laughs to herself.
“What?” I ask, not sure what she means.
“To be able to just go on with your life and treat people like they never mattered to you.” She kicks off her shoes and stares down at her feet for a long moment before turning her gaze back to me.
“When I found out about you, I was so angry. I was so hurt. But then I realized, this is what he does. So instead of anger, for you, I felt sorrow. I felt pity. Because I knew, like me, you would have no idea what hit you until it actually happened. So you want to know what I think Logan?” She pauses, taking a shaky inhale.
“I think you should turn away from this place and run. Run as fast as you possibly can. Because Bentley is not a man that gives his heart to one woman. He is a man that gives his body to several, but never his heart. He will pull you in and when you least expect it, he will shatter every piece of you. He did it to me, he will do it to you. It's his game.”
“I don't believe that.” I say, surprised by my own words but for whatever reason, I can't stomach just letting her bash Bentley like this. “I don't know what man you think you know, but the man you're describing is not the man I love.”
“That's because that man does not exist. Don't you get it? You are in the same place that I was in a year ago. This is what he does. Take my advice, don't take my advice, at the end of the day, you're the one that has to live with the fall out. But really think about it Logan. How often do you see him? How do really know what he's up to when he's here or in Seattle or at one of his other clubs? Do you re
ally think a man like Bentley Reed has it in him to go weeks without sleeping with anyone despite the fact that everywhere he goes, woman practically throw themselves at him?”
“I can't listen to this anymore. Coming here was a mistake.” I say, standing and crossing the space towards the door. The second I wrap my hand around the knob and pull, I jump, startled by Bentley who is standing in the doorway.
I can tell by the look on his face that he is beyond pissed. Stepping towards me, he gives me no choice but to step back into the dressing room, his eyes locked firmly on Madison. It isn't until I step to the side that I catch sight of Ethan, who throws me an apologetic look as he steps inside the room as well.
“What the fuck are you doing?” Bentley rounds on Madison the moment I am out of the way.
“I... I..” She stumbles backwards a couple of steps, clearly caught off guard by how angry he appears to be.
“Bentley she didn't do anything.” I finally manage to get out. “I came here looking for her.” I admit when he turns wide eyes on me. “She didn't do anything wrong.”
I can see the hurt on his face, the disbelief, but he quickly pushes it down and turns his attention back to Madison. “Get your shit and get the fuck out of my club.” He says, turning and grabbing my forearm. “Get her out of here Ethan.” He says, just before he practically drags me out of the room.
He walks in complete silence down the hallway before finally leading me into what appears to be the back office. The moment we step inside he slams the door shut and begins pacing the small space, curse words spewing from his mouth.
“Bentley. I....” I start but he immediately stops pacing and faces me, essentially rendering me speechless.
“What the fuck were you doing with Madison?” His words are tense and I can tell that he is trying like hell to control his temper.
“I don't know.” I admit. “Cora told me that I needed to talk to her. I brushed it off. I didn't want to listen to her. But when you asked me to come to New York with you, I don't know, I thought maybe I would find her and just see.”