All That We Are Read online

  “What time is it?” I glance at the clock above the door, instantly doing a double take when I see it’s already after eleven. “Holy crap, is it really that late?”

  “You’ve been hard at it.” He nods. “I came back earlier, and you were so focused on what you were doing you didn’t even notice me. I decided to leave you be. Got roped into doing a quick touch up; otherwise I would have offered to take you home a couple of hours ago.”

  “Yeah, I was in the zone there for a while. It feels good,” I admit. “Having something to focus on other than my failed marriage and the fact that I have nothing going for me.”

  I wish I could take the statement back the second it leaves my lips. That may be exactly how I feel, but it certainly isn’t something I should be sharing with Miles – my new boss.

  “Don’t say shit like that. You’ve got plenty going for you.”

  “Yeah. Okay.” I lean back in the chair as I cross my arms in front of myself.

  “God, you’re so much like your brother sometimes.” He grins, scratching the side of his beard.

  “Well you love my brother, so I guess that’s a good thing,” I tease, butterflies erupting in my stomach when a full-blown smile stretches across his handsome face.

  “Anyway, you about ready to head out?” Miles completely bypasses my statement as he stands, stretching his arms over his head causing his shirt to ride up.

  My gaze locks onto the small sliver of naturally tan skin before eyeing a tattoo that looks to extend from his side to about the middle of his stomach, some of it still hidden by his shirt while the rest dips below the waistband of his jeans. I’m curious about what the tattoo is and just how far down it goes.

  Heat creeps up my neck and spreads across my cheeks, and I quickly look down, pretending like I’m looking for something on the desk so that I don’t have to meet his gaze.

  “Yeah, give me just a minute,” I finally answer his question, reshuffling a couple of the files in front of me.

  “I’ll meet you out front. Whenever you’re ready.” He drops his arms before turning toward the door.

  “Okay, thanks.” I barely look up as Miles exits the office.

  “What the hell, Harlow?” I accost myself seconds after Miles disappears around the corner.

  It’s bad enough that I’ve spent most of the day fantasizing about my brother’s best friend, but to ogle him in plain sight is taking it a bit far.

  Don’t get me wrong. I have no intentions of pursuing Miles Hollins. I’m not interested in any man at this point in my life, especially not one like him. But something is thrilling about the thought of it.

  He’s the exact opposite of Alan. Rough and rugged. The type of man you can look at once and know he’s hiding a world of secrets behind his eyes.

  Alan was always so proper. Khakis and polo shirts. Expensive cologne. Perfectly styled hair. I can’t even remember a time in our entire relationship that he sported so much as a five o’clock shadow. He was so put together all the time that it had begun to bother me over time. At first, I loved that about him. Loved how he took care of himself and how much pride he took in his appearance. But then I started to realize that it was all a façade. A pretty picture to cover the snake within. God, what a joke.

  But Miles...Miles is all man. Unapologetic. Sexy as sin without even trying. And while he seems comfortable and confident, I’d venture to say there’s a lot more to Miles than he lets people see. There’s something there. Something dark. Something I can’t quite put my finger on. But instead of making me want to stay away, it’s almost like it’s drawing me in. I can’t help but wonder if I peeled back the layers what I might find.

  Letting out a slow breath, I try to refocus my thoughts on work. I quickly sort a few additional files off to one side because I’ll need to work on them first. Since the shop is closed on Sunday I won’t get to any of this until Monday.

  I still can’t wrap my head around how quickly all of this happened. This is the furthest from how I anticipated this day to go. I figured I’d clean the apartment, maybe visit Dad, then veg out on the couch for the rest of the day feeling sorry for myself and worrying the whole time about whether or not I’d be able to land a decent job anytime soon.

  Now here I am, a full-time employee at Inked. Who would have thought after all these years that I’d end up working for Miles Hollins. Seems crazy to even think about.

  And crazy is exactly how I felt when I accepted his offer to come work for him. But now I’m really glad I did. Not only does it give me the ability to start to rebuild a little, but it also gives me purpose. Something to focus on. Not to mention the pay is way more than I was anticipating.

  I’m not sure if Miles was planning to pay whoever he hired this salary, but I certainly was not expecting what he offered. Maybe after I showed my worth a little, but not right off the bat. Hell, with what he’s paying me, I’ll be able to move out of Winston’s within a few short weeks and not only make it on my own but do so comfortably.

  A part of me worries that maybe he’s doing this as a favor to Winston and he doesn’t really want me here, but that thought only pushes me to be successful even more. No matter what his intentions, I’m determined to prove that he made the right choice in giving me this job.

  Considering Miles is waiting to take me home, I quickly power off the computer to my right before standing, shoving my cell phone into my back pocket as I make my way out of the office.

  The shop is pretty quiet compared to earlier. All but one of the artists have gone home for the night, and the only customer that remains is the one he’s working on.

  I didn’t get a ton of time to spend with the guys that were working tonight, but they all seemed really nice. Tubbs, the guy that’s still here, was even sweet enough to get me a sandwich from the sub shop next door without me asking for one.

  While it’s definitely a little outside of my usual surroundings, I can see myself fitting in here. It’ll probably take me a little time, but with such a fun group I think us all being friends is inevitable. Well, considering they don’t all hate me once they get to know me.

  I hate that I even have to think that way. I know it stems from years of Alan convincing me I wasn’t good enough, and it’s not true. If only I could shut off that way of thinking.

  But once something takes root it’s a lot harder to shake than some might think, especially someone who’s never dealt with such a manipulative and emotionally abusive person as Alan. Even all these weeks later, I’m still discovering damaged parts that I never knew existed until I was away from him.

  “Bye, Tubbs,” I call as I pass by his work area on my way toward the lobby.

  He looks up and gives me a crooked smile.

  While he’s no Miles, Parson Tubbs is definitely good looking. I’d guess him maybe in his late twenties, around five-ten, with broad shoulders, and perhaps the thickest biceps I’ve ever seen. But it’s his smile that really stands out. There’s something so infectious about it. Add in the dark eyes, two day-old-scruff, and one hell of a man bun, and Tubbs is one nice piece of eye candy.

  “’Bout time boss man let you off. Slave driver I tell ya.” He chuckles.

  “He’s the worst,” I tease. “Have a good night.” I throw him a quick wave.

  “You too.” He graces me with another smile before turning his attention back to the forearm tattoo he’s working on.

  “You better watch flirting with the guys like that.” Miles’ voice washes over me as I hit the lobby. I jump slightly and turn, having not realized he had come up behind me.

  “Huh?” I start, pulling to a stop just inside the door.

  “Tubbs. You give him an inch and he’ll take a mile.” He smiles, but the action doesn’t quite reach his eyes.

  “I’m not giving him anything,” I insist, a little taken aback. “It’s called being friendly,” I inform him, gaining a little composure.

  “If you say so.” He shakes his head. “You ’bout ready?”


  “Yeah. I’ve done all I can do for tonight. If it’s okay, I’d like to come in early on Monday before the shop opens so I have some quiet time to strap down.”

  “Sure.” He slips his hand into his pocket and pulls out a set of keys, fiddling with the ring for a long moment before finally freeing one of the keys. “Here.” He tosses it in my direction, and I quickly snatch it out of the air.

  Opening my palm, I examine the silver key for a long moment.

  “You’re giving me a key to the shop?” I question, a little surprised that he trusts me so much. Then again, I guess we have technically known each other nearly our entire lives.

  “Pretty sure you’re not going to rob me. You’re not, are you?” he adds on jokingly.

  “Shut up.” I laugh, shoving the key into my pocket.

  “You’re welcome to come and go as you please. I’ll text you the alarm code so you don’t set it off when you come in. The only thing I ask is that I know ahead of time what hours you’ll be working each week.”

  “Okay.” I nod. “I’ll probably bounce around a little the first couple of weeks and see what works best. I want to make sure I’m here during business hours as much as I can be without getting in the way.”

  “You won’t be in the way. The office is yours. Do with it what you want. Now that you’re handling the books, I won’t really need to be in there much. I’d much rather be out here.” He gestures around the room.

  “Okay. We’ll figure it out.”

  “Well, I guess I should get you home.” He takes off toward the front door, pushing it open seconds later. I quickly follow him out, thanking him for holding the door as I pass.

  The night air is warm but void of the heavy humidity that was almost suffocating earlier this afternoon. I cross the sidewalk to where Miles’ bike is parked on the curb, trying to contain the way my body trembles slightly when he settles the helmet on my head and clasps the strap under my chin.

  “Here.” He turns and lifts the bike seat, pulling out a sweatshirt before closing the seat. Turning back toward me, he drops the unzipped hoodie over my shoulders. “The breeze gets a bit chilly this late at night.” He waits until I have both arms through the sleeves before zipping it up.

  I look down, most of my view obstructed by the bulky helmet, before looking back up at Miles. I wish my heart didn’t kick up at the sweet gesture, but I have about as much control over it as I do the weather – none.

  “Aren’t you going to need it?” I question, pushing up the sleeves that are nearly two times too long for my little arms.

  “Nah. I’ll be fine.” He shrugs before climbing onto his bike. He reaches for me the moment he’s on and helps me up. Instantly, I settle in behind him, wishing it didn’t feel so good to wrap my arms around his middle and hold him tight, but at the same time loving that it does.

  If I didn’t know any better, I’d swear I was crushing on Miles Hollins. Correction – I am totally crushing on Miles Hollins. But that’s normal, right? I mean, he’s gorgeous. I’d have to be blind not to be a little smitten with him.

  The bike purrs to life beneath us, breaking me from where my mind has drifted. Within seconds we’re speeding down the road, the night air whipping around us.

  The city is still bustling with activity as we make our way through traffic. I’d forgotten how alive this city is at night and for the first time in a very long time, I feel an odd sense of belonging.

  Slowly, little by little, I start to remember all the things I loved about home. As well as finding new things to love. I know I didn’t think so in the beginning, but I’m starting to see that coming home is the best thing I could have done.

  I may not have it all figured out just yet, but for the first time in years, I feel like I’m exactly where I’m meant to be.

  Chapter Nine

  Miles

  “You hired my sister?” Winston scratches the back of his head as he slides a beer into my hand.

  I didn’t intend to hang out but given that Winston pulled into the parking lot of his apartment building directly behind Harlow and me, I figured I should at least talk to him about what transpired today.

  “I’m fucking confused,” he continues since I’d yet to respond, dropping down onto the opposite end of the couch. “How the hell did that happen?”

  “She needed a job. I had an opening.” I give him the short version, glancing over my shoulder to ensure Harlow’s bedroom door is closed so hopefully we’re not overheard. Not that I have anything to hide, but I don’t want to censor myself.

  When we got up to the apartment, she made a beeline for her room and hasn’t come out since. Either she really was as tired as she claimed or she’s worried about her brother’s reaction to seeing us on my bike and is hoping to avoid the conversation tonight. My guess is the latter.

  “You really think Inked is the place for someone like Harlow? No offense, but have you looked at some of the dudes that come in that place?”

  “What are you trying to say?” I shift to the side slightly so that I’m facing him.

  “It’s a tattoo shop, man. And Harlow, well she’s Harlow. I don’t want her getting fucked with.”

  “Do you really think I would let anyone fuck with your sister?” I give him a look that says he should know me better than that. “Look, I didn’t plan to offer her the job. Hell, the thought had never even crossed my mind. But we were at lunch with your dad, and they were talking about her needing a job and what she went to school for. I kind of offered it without really thinking it through. But in truth, I think she’ll be a great fit. She’s already accomplished more tonight than Delia, and I have managed to do in six months. I need someone like her keeping my shit straight and she needs an income. If you ask me it’s a win-win.”

  “You went to lunch together? How the hell did that happen?”

  “I stopped by earlier this morning to see if you wanted to head over to your dad’s shop with me. Harlow was here, and you weren’t. She mentioned going to visit your dad, so I asked if she wanted to tag along with me.”

  “So, what? You guys are hanging out now?” If I didn’t know any better, I’d say the thought bothers him. I’m not sure why it would though. I know he’s pretty protective of Harlow, but he’s never had to be with me. He’s always known where I stand and that I would never fuck with her.

  “I don’t know that I would classify it as hanging out. We went to see your dad and had lunch. Something you and I have done a million times.”

  “Yeah, you and I, not you and Harlow. I don’t know, man.” He shakes his head, taking a long pull from his beer. “If you ask me it’s kinda weird.”

  “What is?”

  “You are hanging out with my sister. You two couldn’t stand each other for years. Now all of a sudden you’re buddy-buddy.”

  “For one, we’re not hanging out. We did one thing together – once – because you weren’t around. Two, I realize we didn’t get along in the past, but people change. I would think you of all people would understand that. And three, I thought you’d be happy that I’m playing nice.”

  “Won’t lie, I’m glad you two aren’t ready to rip each other’s heads off. But I gotta say, seeing my sister climb off the back of your bike at nearly midnight didn’t make me all warm and fuzzy inside.”

  “Winston, we’re talking about your little sister. Do you really think I would ever go there?” I shake my head like it’s the most ridiculous thought in the world, when in actuality I’ve thought about it more times today than I care to admit.

  “Nah, I guess not.” He chuckles, taking another pull of beer.

  “Your family is my family. It always has been. Even when I couldn’t stand her, Harlow has always been included in that circle. You know that. And giving her a job is my way of helping my family.”

  “I appreciate that.” Winston seems to relax, sinking further into the couch.

  Guilt grips tightly in my chest but I push it down. I have nothing to feel guilty for. So I fi
nd Harlow attractive. What man wouldn’t? She’s not only beautiful, but I’m quickly learning she’s also very sweet when she wants to be, and her funny and quick-witted banter is a lot cuter now than I remember it being when we were younger. But that’s where it ends.

  Or is it?

  I shake off the thought, downing half my beer in one long gulp.

  “I just hope you know what you’re getting yourself into. You know how much Harlow has always loved busting your balls. Are you really prepared to deal with that on a daily basis?”

  “Well I guess I don’t have a choice now, do I? The job is already hers.” I grin.

  “You could always fire her,” he jokes.

  “Let’s just see how this plays out first,” I suggest, humor in my voice. “So what’s up with you and Stella? Harlow said you stayed at her place last night.” I need to change the subject, knowing bringing up Stella will most definitely do the trick.

  “Things are good. She finally forgave me.”

  “I didn’t realize you did anything wrong.” I tip the beer bottle to my mouth, a knowing smile playing on my lips.

  “Neither did I.” He chuckles. “When in doubt, always assume it was your fault.”

  “Now that’s just sad.” I shake my head. “I get that you care about the girl, Winst, but seriously, how long are you going to keep this up?”

  “I don’t know, dude. I’m not getting any fucking younger, and Stella is the whole package. I do want to get married and have kids, at least eventually. Fuck, I’ll be thirty-five this year.”

  “And you think Stella is the woman to provide that for you?” I give him a doubtful look.

  “I get that we’re kind of all over the place.”

  “All over the place? You two are like a match and a stick of dynamite playing chicken.”

  “We’re not that bad,” he disagrees. “Okay, maybe it’s not the healthiest relationship. But Stella’s still young. She’ll get there. And when she does, I’ll be the guy who stood by her through all her crazy.”